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Life is an art form, your mind is a mystery, master them both.

I’m going to be honest with ya’ll. I hesitated to write this piece. It’s not that I didn’t want to share this incredible experience with my folks - I wasn’t trying to be secretive or mysterious about it. On the contrary. Upon returning from 10 days of silent meditation, I wanted to load up a bus with all of you, and go directly to Shelburne, Massachusetts to the meditation center. I struggled to find ways to put this experience into words that would not lead to you all recommending commitment to the psychiatric ward.

Upon arriving at the Vipassana Meditation Retreat, I didn’t know what to expect. I mean, I had done my research. I read every piece of information on the website and even read The Art of Living. I thought I knew it all, what the food would be (vegetarian), the schedule (up at 4 a.m., down at 9:30. p.m.), I knew not to bring anything and that I couldn’t speak to anyone. I was ready. My mother dropped me off and after jokingly asking if I was joining a cult and if I would be returning with a shaved head, I bid her adieu and walked into the center, unassuming and ready.

The center is in a secluded area, completed surrounded by trees, a natural sanctuary. The facility was simple and bare - there were no posters or paintings on the walls, no fancy lighting or decorations, no music playing, no TV’s, no stimulations. Since there would be no speaking, there was a bulletin board, where the days schedule changes and announcements were posted. Students are instructed to leave behind all external distractions - including reading and writing material, music, cell phones and all religious objects. Men and women are completely separated from each other. The rules are simple: dress modestly, observe

The Code of Discipline was to remain silent. By silence, I mean all forms of communication, verbal and non-verbal, are discouraged. No eye contact, gesturing or smiling. Essentially, all outside stimulation was removed and I was left with the one thing I went there to become acquainted with…myself.

Vipassana, meaning “seeing things as they really are” is an ancient Indian mediation technique. According to Wikipedia, It is a way of mental purification through self observation and introspection. It focuses on the deep interconnection between mind

and body, which can be experienced directly by disciplined attention to the physical sensations that form the life of the body, and that continuously interconnect and condition the life of the mind. The instructions are not esoteric or difficult, but basically involve retraining the mind to avoid its innate conditioned response to most stimuli. The purpose is to bring full awareness of the mind, body and all sensations and be fully present. This practice is thought to develop a deep, experiential understanding of the impermanence of all phenomena and also brings to the surface and dissolves deep-seated complexes and tensions. The Dhamma website describes the process as: One begins by observing the natural breath to concentrate the mind. With a sharpened awareness one proceeds to observe the changing nature of body and mind and experiences the universal truths of impermanence, suffering and egolessness. This truth-realization by direct experience is the process of purification.

Now, you may be asking yourself, if I was there, why is she using outside sources to describe this experience? Dear friends, if I had to describe what this experience was, it would sound something like: “It was some crazy, psychedelic, third dimension, Twilight Zone, intergalactic, mind altering sh** yo!” Not very articulate right?

At 8 p.m. on the first night, Noble Silence began. For 10 days, I meditated for 13 hours a day. Hour after hour, I worked to train the wild animal that was my mind, initially unable to stay focused on anything for more than two minutes. Meanwhile, my body also resisted. Sitting for two hours straight?! Oh hell no. My bones cracked, my back ached, and my knees creaked. There were times when I wanted to run - run far away from that place. It became painful, physically, mentally and emotionally draining. Slowly, my

mind sharpened, I became aware. My senses became extremely sensitive; the sun seemed brighter, the wind felt cooler, nature’s songs became clearer. The pain never went away but the realizations and surfacing truths were real and profound. I left with a sense of resolve and self-understanding that I didn’t know was possible, and I learned that self-work is the hardest but most important work I will ever do and a job that will never be fully completed.

I’ve left a lot of details of my experience out of this piece on purpose. For Vipasssana meditation to be successful, it must be experienced solely within the framework of one’s own body. Everything I felt and realized came from inside, therefore, I will refrain from sharing the details to avoid skewing anybody else’s experience and to avoid creating expectations and assumptions amongst readers. I will say that I strongly recommend this retreat to anyone interested in knowing themselves on a deeper level. Ten days may sound like a long time, but in the scheme of life, is it really? Trust and believe, the benefits will far exceed your expectations. The retreat is FREE (yea, for real) and is run exclusively on donations and volunteers. There are centers around the world and throughout the United States including Massachusetts, California, Maryland, Virginia and Michigan. Seriously people, the loss is minimum and the gains are life long.

The Art of Living: Vipassana Meditation